


Hard Choice

by dracoglacies



Category: Senki Zesshou Symphogear
Genre: Coercion, Dubious Consent, F/F, Forced Orgasm, Rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-16 10:09:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28954761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dracoglacies/pseuds/dracoglacies
Summary: Two choices given to her, and yet Chris knew only one was the only thing she could have picked.She just wished it wouldn't hurt as bad as it was.
Relationships: Kohinata Miku/Yukine Chris
Kudos: 13





	Hard Choice

Trying to keep herself calm, Chris stilled her body. She shouldn’t move, instincts that she had long forgotten resurfacing at this moment, telling her that fighting would be useless. That the best thing to do would be to keep her head bowed and save the fighting for when she could do it again. Not right now. Her throat felt tight, her body tensing as if wanting to just let her run out of here.

The floor didn’t feel painful against her knees, the soft carpet giving them a nice cushion. But she couldn’t really focus on that, instead all she could was struggling inwardly against the feeling of  _ her _ hand against her head. The fingers ran through her hair slowly— and she perhaps could even say it was gentle. Not like that mattered, when each stroke just sent her skin crawling.

“Amusing. You, who is supposed to be the most brazen and outspoken of all instead stayed silent and docile.” Shem-ha’s voice wasn’t smug per se, but still it sent a stab of fear through Chris. Reminding her of someone else. Of something else. Their visage overlapping together within her head, and those were the true shackles that kept her mouth shut. The hand stopped, and Shem-ha’s next words sent chills across her spine. “Boredom is something I have grown accustomed to, but I have new toys I can use to alleviate them.” The hand slowly moved down, caressing her cheeks before lifting her head up and forcing her to look into those red-ringed eyes. The white hairs framed her face beautifully. Perfect like the Custodian Shem-ha was. But that didn't matter to Chris, she never cared for appearances. “Let’s play a game, you and I.”

A part of her wanted to refuse. To attack and just do something. But not even her finger dared to twitch at the sight. And yet… and yet— “What if I refuse?” Being polite was important. Angering Shem-ha would be stupid.

“Do you wish for my attention to be given to someone else?” Amusement completely filled the tone now. “My old vessel’s beloved will be a good choice after all. Oh how her eyes would darken as she realized what I will do. Or perhaps, those two that you held dear within your heart?”

No.

Nononono.

Panic pressed down upon her, and Chris sincerely wished her weapon was back upon her hold. But that was a useless thing to think of. “I— I accept your game.” Her voice choked up slightly, but she couldn’t see any other choice. Better her than anyone else. She tried repeating that within her mind. To calm herself down slightly. After all, Shem-ha wouldn’t do… anything too hurtful, right? And Chris had her experiences already, the things that had both hurt and strengthened her.

But with the way Shem-ha smiled, full of cruelty, a sinking feeling grew within her. “A good choice.” The thumb moved up, caressing Chris’s lips slightly. “You are close with my old vessel. Someone she had grown to think as a good, close friend.” Her heart thumped heavily as she listened, a bad feeling growing with each word. “Take her. Violate that part of her, a maiden’s most cherished part. That’s what you will do.”

Her heart felt cold as she shook there, her body trembling at the very thought. She couldn’t. There was no way she could do that. “No. No. Please. Don’t do that. Miku—” Even as those words tumbled out, she still couldn’t move. The bindings, the scars within her still proved stronger. Still, she had to deny that. There was no way she could accept that.

“Then I suppose it is time for me to pay a visit to your friends. After all, with this refusal… I have nothing else to push away the boredom that has plagued me so.”

That had to be a lie, considering the amusement she could hear. “I—” But what other choices could she pick? The moment she thought of that, her thoughts lashed at her at once. Scolding her at how disgusting she had to be, to consider doing that to Miku. The nauseous feeling grew stronger, and yet she could still hold it back. Her old habit and behavior helped her in this situation. “... yes. I’ll do it.” She whispered, holding back the tears that threatened to slip out of her eyes. She couldn’t do that. Not with her accepting this cursed agreement.

“Good girl.” Shem-ha’s hand patted her once more, and this time Chris couldn’t even feel the disgust anymore. She was just tired. “Just remember… if you turn your back upon this, it is not you that will pay the price.”

* * *

How many times have they done this? Chris wasn’t sure, but her hand immediately halted the moment she saw the tears slipping out of Miku’s eyes, the way the woman below her shuddering, flinching slightly beneath her touch. Her heart ached fiercely, even as she continued to pepper kisses onto the skin, feeling the tremble against her own body. “It’s okay, it’ll be okay…” She whispered down, careful to not let her words be heard. She didn’t wish for things to possibly go worse, especially if  _ she _ thought that Chris intentionally tried to soothe the pain within Miku.  _ ‘As if that would be healed so easily…’ _

Miku didn’t reply, the only answer she could get was the way the body tensed, the sharp inhale she had done while looking away. She understood the reason, but that didn’t mean it didn’t feel like someone just twisted a knife in her heart. But still, she didn’t relent on her touches, on the kisses. After all, it was best if Miku was as aroused as possible for the next part. That would be better than what was done to herself—

A few tears of her own slipped out, Chris barely holding onto Miku, bile nearly coming out of her stomach. No. She— she couldn’t compare herself to Miku like that. Miku was the one hurting right now, the victim in this situation. No matter how much Chris understood the feeling, she was the one being despicable at this moment. “It’s okay.” She murmured again, the words ringing hollowly in the air.

Both of them knew that was just a platitude. That didn’t stop the pain still shining so clearly within Miku’s green eyes. Nor could she stop right now, not if she wished for Miku to not be in pain. The screams that came out of Miku’s throat last time she stopped, unable to continue, were too much.

_ ‘If you didn’t throw away your responsibility, your promise, perhaps she won’t be punished this bad.’ _

Chris still remembered the way Shem-ha’s hand slowly caressed down Miku’s body. Intentionally touching the wounds the goddess had inflicted. Those whimpers of pain still echoed within her head even now, and she regretted it. She should have been stronger, pushing down the memories that had bubbled up. But she couldn’t, back then. At least now she still managed to push it away, to keep the lump within her throat to stay there.

Of course it still hurt. Of course she wished to stop. But she couldn’t make it worse to Miku, nor could she let Shem-ha turn her eyes towards everyone else. So Chris swallowed down any of her possible words, and let her hand slowly drift downwards. Past the stomach, the slight tuft of hair and towards the wetness that had been gathering there for a while.

After all, beyond the memories of what happened back then, Chris had been told to do this a few times by now. The goddess must have thought that it would be fun to see Chris being so pained at the experience, at the way she hated that she was doing the same thing done to her to someone else. It was wrong on so many levels, and yet that was the world they were in.

Miku’s body jerked as Chris gently touched the sensitive area, a cry escaping her mouth without any prompting. No matter how many times they had done this song and dance— their body was sensitive to the touches all the same. In fact, it might be possible that they had become more sensitive to it. After all, the more a body feels pleasure from a certain stimulation, the more the body seeks to get more of them.

In some ways, Chris held onto this because she could still hear the stifled pleasured moan out of Miku’s mouth. She didn’t think she could force herself to continue, to constantly force her— there was a word she would use to describe Miku, back then. But considering what she had done now, she pushed them away. She had no rights to use that word. Especially not while Miku never talked back at her anymore, never answered her with any sort of words.

Insults or condemnation would be preferable than this silent acceptance. Because Miku could fight. No bindings were put onto both of them, showing how cruel Shem-ha was. After all, she stripped away their choices, taking away their Symphogears unless they were willingly submitting their mind into the goddess’s control. But within that same choice, they were told that they better follow her orders… unless they wished for their friends to get hurt. After all, it would be so easy for Shem-ha to focus her attention upon them…

So they could only submit, which wasn’t even a choice to be considered. Or they could make each other suffer, hurting until Shem-ha would grow bored of her toys. That was what they were now, after all.

For a brief, brief moment, Chris wondered how it would feel if she gave up. But even that very thought sent shivers down her spine, and she violently threw it out of her thoughts. No. That wasn’t a choice. Never. As long as her friends still fought, she wouldn’t give up. Maybe even then. She could survive hell on Earth back then, this was just another hell she had to survive through. One way or another, she would be able to fight once more, to let loose against Shem-ha.

Pausing slightly, Chris took a deep breath to momentarily calm herself— much to the confusion of Miku beneath her, a questioning noise that could be heard so very easily. Never did she stop like that after all, not after what happened then. But Chris quickly and gently kissed her on the throat, just calming and showing that no, she wouldn’t stop. It would be cruel.

“Don’t mind me, just focus on the pleasure.” She whispered, tender, as her fingers slowly penetrated into the warmth. Feeling the wetness against her digits as she pushed them deeper into the walls. Still tight, even after so many times they had done this. She pondered if Shem-ha had to do with it, but she pushed that away. That didn’t matter, either way, she would try to keep it as pleasurable as possible for Miku.

The only way she could atone.

She wished she could close her eyes, but doing that meant she was hiding away from her sins. So she didn’t. She kept her eyes open, even when Miku’s fluttered closed occasionally, calling the name that wasn’t hers. “Hibiki…” Did Miku ever call her name again? Chris didn’t know, nor did she want to ask.

She didn’t deserve it.

But she would be lying if it didn’t hurt. Even if what she was doing was unforgivable. Even if she couldn’t call Miku anything else, except for her name. A part of her still selfishly wished that Miku could understand, that she didn’t wish for things to come down to this as well. But that was stupid of her, just like how tears kept rolling down her eyes.

“I know I shouldn’t cry. That you are hurting more.” She couldn’t help but whisper, even as her hand never stopped to make Miku whimper and moan. “After all I’m a demon for doing this.”

_ ‘Is mental anguish better than physical pain?’ _ She didn’t know the answer to that. Perhaps she even picked the wrong choices so far. Doubt ate at her, chomping down at her certainty. Her sureness that this was the only choice. After all, if she didn’t do this, then Miku would be hurt. Then everyone else would also be hurt.

At the same time, wasn’t what she was doing also hurt Miku all the same? What would the other Adaptors think if they knew what she had picked…? The thought of Hibiki knowing what she had done nearly made Chris stop automatically. Fear passed through her sharply, as if she had been stabbed right in the guts. She forcibly made her body continue, better finish this quick so they could just be done for the day.

Then Miku didn’t need to look at her, nor did she need to look at anyone else. A monster didn’t deserve to be with humans. And she had been one, for a long while, hadn’t she? The choices she had picked back then, the one that led her to activate Solomon’s Cane. The amount of people she had ended up turning to ashes because of that… Her stomach heaved, but Chris handled it with practiced ease. She had been pushing this away constantly after all. Not willing to dwell upon it longer than she needed to. Especially not when she was in front of Miku.

Right, she had to just focus on the present right now. Slowly, with deliberate movement, she pulled her fingers out, her thumb still occasionally teasing the folds and that one sensitive bud. The noises Miku made became louder and drowned out the thoughts within her own mind, and Chris willingly let herself submerge within them. Let herself drown, even if it was merely a moment.

When her hand was finally out of Miku’s body, Chris paused for a moment, letting Miku savor the situation. Just a few seconds of Chris not violating her body but still on top of her. 

“Please bear with it.” A whisper, a begging note slipping into her tone. Chris leaned down once more, kissing the body beneath her again. Showing love and care as her fingers fucked Miku a bit more harshly, reaching deeper and sending stars to Miku’s vision. To swamp Miku until there was nothing else to think of. Chris too moved her kissing to the erogenous zones she knew of. The ones that made Miku’s body arch, pressing towards the stimulation as if seeking for more.

A body didn’t shy away from what made it feel good, no matter the desire of the person within. It wasn’t Miku’s fault those involuntary reaction let Chris reassure herself a little, that the two of them were still—

Her mind caught up with those thoughts, and she pushed them away once more. No. She had no need to think of that. Just… focus on the mewls coming out of Miku. The wet, squishy sound that came as her fingers worked deep within… The way the body was pressing against her was quite telling. Miku should come soon.

So Chris worked a bit faster, adding her thumb to the mix and not letting it be idle. Her other hand too, started working on Miku’s other breast, gently and sent Miku over the top. To go over the threshold—

And Miku’s mouth opened in a wordless cry, her body shuddering, clenching against the fingers. Chris continued to press, prolonging the orgasm as best as she could, until Miku couldn’t anymore and she had no choice but to stop. Slowly, Chris pulled her fingers out again, gingerly and cautiously before she backed away.

A part of her wished to hold Miku. A part of her screamed at her at how dare she even think to comfort the person she had just— her brain skipped over the word. She couldn’t use that. She couldn’t. If she admitted it, she didn’t think she could continue, and then… and then all her past actions would be for naught.

“I’m sorry.” She murmured brokenly to the silent space between them. It rang hollowly, without meaning, because if she was truly apologetic, she wouldn’t continue it. She could try to fight again— but that would merely send Shem-ha against Miku again. Against everyone else and that couldn’t be the choice she picked.

So tomorrow they would do this again, over and over without end.


End file.
